When you picture “Meditation”….
what sort of image pops into your head?
As a rebel and activist, I had never considered meditation. That was hippie shit. Something people did in ashrams dressed in white.
I was a questioner, an activist, ass-kicker and a heavy metal lover.
“Meditation? who the hell had time for that? “
I was busy trying change the world.
I didn’t know anyone who meditated. My free time was mostly spent in tattoo shops and at gigs. Not really the typical meditation crowd.
I had been going to yoga classes but Yoga was purely physical to me. It just made me feel good. I was clueless about the more mindful, inner aspects of Yoga.
I was introduced to meditation in Yoga Teacher Training. I naively thought that meditation would be easy. I’d just sit cross legged, put my fingers in some fancy-ass mudra and BAM! Enlightenment, right?
Reality check! I couldn’t sit still, my mind was all over the place. My back hurt.
I was shocked! Fuck, this was hard. Clearly meditation wasn’t for me. Nope, I was way too intense for that shit.
Yet, “learn to meditate” kept repeating in the back of my mind. I wasn’t the type to give up easily (I was hard core, after all).
Finally, after years of secretly reading Buddhist books, I came out of the Buddhist closet, so to speak.
The Buddha was a Rebel, no doubt.
He totally went “against the stream” of the current spiritual practices of his time in India. So I had massive respect for the Buddha.
He recommended The Three Jewels:
- Buddha (“Enlightenment” in Sanskrit)
- Dharma (“Teachings” in sanskrit)
- Sangha (“Community” in Sanskrit)
Sangha. As a lone wolf, I had zero interest in joining a Sangha.
But, I had a lot of questions and really needed a teacher to help me with my practice. So, I reluctantly went in search of Sangha. Eventually, I found teacher that could answer all my questions (I had a lot).
Unfortunately, meditation was part of the deal when joining a Sangha.
So I learned to meditate. In my first class my teacher said “Everybody thinks during meditation. Thinking is part of the human experience”.
What? I was “normal”?
(That was a first). So I could cut myself some slack when my mind was all over the place?
So now I “sit” ALMOST everyday (I am a rebel after all). It’s made a massive difference in my life. A difference I am truly grateful for.
This post is the first of a memoir series by Nyk Danu. Read more:
- “Activist, Baby, I Was Born This Way” Part 2
- “The Evolution from Anger to Spiritual Activism” Part 3
Also by Nyk Danu: Guided Contemplation, Unity Consciousness (video)